I hate going after guys

It annoys me that every guy I've ever been involved with, I've been the aggressor. I've initiated the contact. I went after them. I talked to them first. I find it annoying. Funny correlation, the guy
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Elidia:
The whole class always laughs at me cuz my sister is in the class with me.
(3 May 2018)

Elidia:
The class takes it too far sometimes, they talk about puberty, orgasms, sex, safe sex, sexual organs like genitals, breasts, etc.
(3 May 2018)

Elidia:
I'm a sophomore, she's a freshman.
(3 May 2018)

Hallie:
What Am I supposed to do?
(3 May 2018)

Hallie:
Also I've had the greatest friendship with this girl there has never been any malice in our friendship.
(3 May 2018)

Hallie:
Now I've confronted him about it and he seemed genuinely shocked and denied it.
(3 May 2018)

Rosia:
Getting back your self esteem?
(3 May 2018)

Rosia:
Anyone have an idea how to win back your sense of self worth?
(3 May 2018)

Rosia:
After he dumped me I actually got into a phd program and got an internship which was good but somehow all of these achievements couldn't fix the pain that someone whom I loved made me feel like such a looser.
(3 May 2018)

Rosia:
The whole thing broke my heart and even after I moved on my self confidence was still a reck.
(3 May 2018)