Whats the best opening line on IM?

Nice and normal?Filth?Funny?Suggestions people please
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Berna:
I have never been in a relationship before and don't really know how being in a relationship changes how you interact with someone.
(9 June 2019)

Berna:
I have asked out this guy I really like (he hasn't responded yet) and am wondering, if he says yes, what to do after that.
(9 June 2019)

Temeka:
Should I call her to ask her to hang out?
(9 June 2019)

Temeka:
Is it better to ask via text or should I call her later at night and ask over the phone?
(9 June 2019)

Temeka:
I'm thinking about asking her again over the phone because it would get a quick answer and less lame than just texting.
(9 June 2019)

Temeka:
I asked her two days later if she wanted to hang out again and she said she's busy with work this week and she would let me know.
(9 June 2019)

Temeka:
So I matched with a girl online and met up with her once last week.
(9 June 2019)

Bobby:
Why can't be satisfied with anything?
(9 June 2019)

Bobby:
She's a loner and I've distanced myself from everyone to only be around her since i liked her that much and i don't know what to do.
(9 June 2019)

Bobby:
But for some reason lately i'm bored and don't really wanna be around her that much.
(9 June 2019)